Uberman of the Matrix

Beckham is the über-metrosexual, not just because he rams metrosexuality down the throats of those men churlish enough to remain retrosexual and refuse to pluck their eyebrows, but also because he is a sportsman, a man of substance--a "real" man--who wishes to disappear into surfaceness in order to become ubiquitous--to become media. Becks is The One, and better looking than Keanu--but, be warned, he's working for the Matrix.